Thursday, May 17, 2012

It was not I

It was not I


I was nine
When you deflowered me.
You touched me
Against my wishes.

I screamed aloud,
But the words
Chocked in my throat
And no voice came out.

I cried silent tears,
In the silence of the night;
Unable to tell anyone
Of what I went through.

I felt violated,
Ashamed of my body,
Unable to look at myself
In the mirror.

But today,years later,
I refuse to let you
Crush my soul
And dampen my spirit.

It is I who decides
Not to tell the world
What you did to me
Behind those walls.

I refuse to let you
Make me guilty
For that I haven't done
What never was my fault.

For I refuse to be
Called a victim and
You as my abuser.
I shall rise and not 
Let you win over me.


 This post was inspired by -
1) Kamala Das' poem An Introduction
2) The second episode of  Satyamev Jayate and 
3) Pinki Virani's award winning book, Bitter chocolate-Child Sexual Abuse in India.

26 comments:

  1. Beautiful....stupendous and soul stirring....loved it dear!!...

    That episode and that book made me also write something. Check it out here http://privytrifles.blogspot.in/2012/05/new-beginning.html.

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    1. Thank you so much :D Am flattered ..willcheck out ur post now :)

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  2. Very poignant poem and really well written. Good Job!!

    Cherry Lane xoxo

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    1. Thank you so much Kiran,you always have the loveliest words to say :)

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  3. Hey this sounds interesting. Do read: http://thandavum.blogspot.in/2012/05/note-about-abuse.html
    you will know why... good luck and you probably dont need it cos you write well.

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    1. See the paradox!! You read exactly the post I asked you to read and I did the same :D Lovely post,you express your ideas really well I must say :)

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  4. Am intrigued. Indeed, very well written! :)

    Love from Bindigasm

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  5. Simple yet well written ...........
    Dont have many words............

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    1. Thanks a bunch Deepthi...you are back!! yay!!

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  7. Very well written poem. I have to admit it made my heart stop for a moment because I thought that you were writing from personal experience! When I saw your note at the end of the poem, I exhaled.
    Great writing.

    Amber

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    1. That was not personal but its taken from a true incident...i know someone who went through the horror of it all for years. I tried to see things through her eyes. Thank you so much for the appreciation,means a lot to me.

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  8. I can't believe the imagery in these words. You did a great job.

    http://www.glamkittenslitterbox.com/
    Twitter: @GlamKitten88

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    1. Thank you so much girl....you made my day!!

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  9. Very touching . . .no matter how hard i try i just imagine the kind of pain people suffer from when they undergo sexual abuse at a tender age . . . how hard it becomes for them to trust people for their rest of life !!!
    Very Well written . ..you have a follower in me <3

    http://healthybeamy.blogspot.in/

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    1. Thank you So very much Rashmi,am glad you liked my poem. Yes, the pain and trauma that the survivors had to go through is unimaginable.

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  10. This poem can be very inspirational for a lot of people who have experienced something like this. Great post.

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    1. Thank you so much Cheryl...am humbled. :)

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  11. Mesmerizing blend of words, thoughts & emotion. :-)
    Satyamebv Jayate...

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  12. I love the way you write. Touched me. Blessed Be! :) :)

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  13. Amazing!!!! Captures the turmoil of the child finally growing up and accepting it as her reality, and deciding not to let it crush her spirit...

    Beautiful use of words. They really send a chill down your spine.

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  14. @Aniesha_thank you so much...the appreciation means a lot :)
    Tight hug

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  15. Just got a chance to read your poem. Nicely put in a free verse. Pain and pleasure are too personal and at times concepts such as child sexual abuse when written from pain shows a valley of difference from a poem written out of inspiration and fantasy. As I sincerely wish that not a single child would have to write a poem such as this in pain, I also pray that the child who still does, goes through healing...

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