This is my first attempt at a love poem (?),so please bear with it. And do tell me if you think I could make it better in any way - anything I should have added or deleted.
Inscrutable
I love you
Because I can love no other
I hate you
Yes I do, very much
My heart torn,
Between loving you
And not loving you
I laugh a laugh of pure ecstasy
And then all of a sudden
Cry out in despair
Knowing you'll never be mine
My only wish now
Is to be consumed
By either, or both-
The fire and ice that swell inside me.
On a random and totally unrelated note the "Yes I do" in the 4th line reminds me of Nicki Minaj's "Superbass" (my sis read the name of the song as "Superb-Ass" the first time she saw it :D).
P.S. - Thank You Arpita for the inputs. Love ya <3
I love it...there is nothing to add or delete...this is something simple original you...hope to see poems from you here again..keep it up girl!! <3 <3
ReplyDeleteP.S- Love Love Love last 4 lines!! :)
OMG OMG...did you say you loved the lines?? am dancing(in my head) thank you!! :D
DeleteLovely poem - truly straight from the heart. There is no change required as it reflects the innocence of love which you feel very beautifully. Excellent attempt must say for a first time...
ReplyDeleteNw tl me - U in love?
Thank you!!! :D :D
DeleteAm in love...hmmm...aren't we all in love? Or lets just say the poem tells it all :P
Oh yes....no doubt we all are in love - with ourselves, with our blogs, with life :)
DeleteLoved it!!
Excellent!! You get my point finally :D Doesn't necessarily have to be romantic love,right?
DeleteGorgeous poem. I love how personal you get. You write beautifully.
ReplyDeletehttp://www.glamkittenslitterbox.com/
Twitter: @GlamKitten88
Thank you Bonnie!! Everything i wrote is fictional,I just love the autobiographical approach :)
DeleteThis is really good. And I'm not just saying that. What I love about poetry is that it is very much like art. There is a different meaning to every viewer and reader. I read this poem a couple times because I'm in a situation right now that feels very similar...
ReplyDeleteAww I hope you come out of it soon.
DeleteThis was my perception of a character but yes I agree that people perceive and understand things in different ways, that is what makes art so beautiful.
Thank you so much, means a lot to me.
Lovely poem. Simple but you've very effectively put across the feeling of tumultuous despair through few words. Great work!!!
ReplyDeleteThanks Fab. :D
DeleteLove need not have a reason
ReplyDeletelest it becomes a treason
"I love you because..."
the words that flow after that "because" are pointers you will find in another too
So does it mean that people can be replaced when you find the same pointers in another?
Then what is love?
Is it a parody? A tragedy? Or simply an over-rated, clumsy, needy hold to hide our loneliness???
If I am truly complacent when alone, would I need another?
Love-A word lost in noise as people fight hard to find one in a world lost fighting for it sans knowing what it truly is sans listening to the voice within.
So what is love? Have you discovered? Have you searched for its meaning before declaring your catch?
If its just a feeling, would it pass just as every other feeling does?
Then what is love?
Wow...this is by far the best and the longest comment i have received on my blog. Excellent questions asked VST. I ponder over the same things. I suppose since love is an abstract concept,its definitions vary with people. Some believe that you love that one person your entire life,some believe in polyamorus love. Some change their fancy with time,some stick. That is what makes love so universal yet new.
DeleteI like the last line about fire and ice! And I've never read the song as "SuperbAss" before, but now that's the only way I'll ever see it, lol.
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
Deletehehe its the same for me.. every time i see the song on TV..i can't help laughing like a hyena :D
Deleteand thanks :)
wow! u write really well. i write poems too. the words are simple, but the message is something to ponder over
ReplyDeletewelcome us as ur new followers!
do visit us too, and follow back, if you like what you see :)
the blog is a virtual birthday surprise for my bestie. would be glad if u could drop by ur wishes!
looking fwd to more posts from ur side!
thenotsogirlyblog.blogspot.in
Thanks girl. :)
DeleteYep...am on your followers list now...that is THE BEST birthday dedication I have seen in my entire life. :D