Irreversible

Hola everyone!!

It was only yesterday that I was thinking how long it has been since I wrote something (as in a poem or a story) and I realised it has been more than a year since I wrote the last one. Flipping through one of my old books, I found a yellowish looking page from one of my notebooks where I had scribbled down a poem (if I may call it so). How I love finding such scribbles!! This was written around 2 years back during my initial poem writing days. This might as well be the very first thing I wrote, methinks. wanted to share it with you. Didn't edit a thing.

IRREVERSIBLE

Standing in front of the mirror,

I look into the blurred image

Through my moist eyes.

Right in front of me,

Is a stranger I know not

Staring right back at me.

Wipe off those tears

In a desperate attempt

And I look again

To find myself

Unlike me anymore.

I marvel how

Loving you and not

Being loved back anymore

Has changed me inside.

The metamorphosis of my self

Has surprised me like no other.

Dear friend, I wish you well.

I say the last goodbye

As I take the other way.

I suppose you can clearly see the influence of Adele's Someone Like You ; I was addicted to it back then. Would love to know what you think of it.

An Ode To Bob Dylan

Hello Bloggy Friends,

It has been a long time I have been MIA. Today I've come up with a poem written by one of my very favourite people on earth and a very old friend, Rakesh Krishnakumar. Rakesh is an engineer to be and a movie buff who has the most amazing taste in world movies. This is what he says about his composition-

It is inspired from Bob Dylan's Masters of War. After hearing that song I was so deeply moved I thought it would be the ideal start for me to write a contemporary version of the same as I thought it suits perfectly in today's context. It is basically aimed at the scheming perpetrators who are sending the country to her lowest lows. My maiden attempt, so please forgive the blunders.

Come See This Blaze, This Golden Glow
The Storm Gathering Might,
The Lighthouse Incinerating The Ships
The Oppressed, The Suppressed, The Beaten Ones
The Torments, The Tortures, The Tricks And The Taunts
Enough With It I Am Warning You.

If Not A Day Will Come And I Hope It Will Soon
When You See The Fire Rising Above Your Mansion
The Fire You Yourself Created To Burn Us Down
The Furnace You Yourself Fabricated To Char Our Souls
You Will See It, Your Same Old Fire Eating Into Your Flesh.

You Say The Times Have Changed
With All The Mud Settling Down
And All The Winds Changing Their Course;
You Say The Warmongers Are All But Dead
And The Blood They Shed Disappeared In The Tide.
You Say Peace Has Shrouded This World
You Say Future For The Unborns Is All Shining Bright.

But I Say Shut Your Ugly Mouth Mister
That Your Petty Tricks Ain't Now Good;
All These Lies And Fake Promises You Offer
Carefully Concealed Inside A Golden Chocolate Wrapper.
Keep 'Em With You, You Sly Oldster
As Times Have Indeed Changed
But They Have Changed Only For Your Bad

You See The Boy Over There, That Poor Little Chap
Cleaning Your Vomit And Washing Your Waste
I Wonder How Old Is He
I Wonder Where Are His Tooth Fairies
Where Are His Christmas Gifts
I Know Its You, The Cunning Orchestrator
Stealing His Childhood, And Tearing His Wings
I Dare You To Look At His Face, See Through His Eyes, Once At least
And If You Do Can't You See A Million Faces

Can't You See The Girl Selling Flesh For A Crumpled Currency
A Widow Grieving The Loss Of Her Other Half
A Mother Mourning Her Infant's Demise
A Peasant Failing To Feed His Cherub Drinking His Tears
A Fragile Weak Contour Receiving The Remains Of Her Beloved Martyr
All Because Of You And You Alone
Because Of Your Fake Bloated Promises
Because Of Your Negligence And Unapologetic Greed
I Just Want To Ask You One Thing
Can You Bear These Curses, All Aimed At You
The Curses Which Can Melt You Down To Your Bloody Ashes

Now You Hear That Sound, That Ever Increasing Tremor
Sound Of That Fast Approaching Storm
You See Those High Concrete Walls Of Yours Shivering
And Those Extravagant Tiles Underneath Your Feet
Cant You Feel Mighty Chasms Forming All Over Them
Not A Pretty Sight, Ain't It You Filthy Schadenfreude.
Ain't You Afraid Now, Ain't You Trembling With Fear
Or Ain't You Even Aware Of These Impending Danger
I Think You Are, As I Can See It In Your Eyes

You Can Put On Your Thickest Armour
You Can Prepare Your Golden Army
You Can Hide Inside Your Storm Shelter
You Can Even Put On An Invisibility Cloak
But Whatever You Do One Thing's For Sure
This Storm Will Rise And When It Rise
You Will Be Surrounded From All The Sides
There Will Be No Escape Both For Your Body And Soul
And That One Tiny Bullet, Oh It Will Find You Boy
The One Which Has Your Name On It
And Will Make You Bleed From Your Wrenched Heart
That Worthless Blood, Your Poisonous Blood

Rakesh, I think you have done a brilliant job for a first attempt. Looking forward to reading more from you buddy :) For those of you who haven't heard Dylan's original-

Till next,

Adios

Scribbles

ENMESHED

To be or not to be

To do or not to

Past and present intertwine

Into a grotesque mesh

Leaving me all confused and knotted.

JUST WISHES

Wishing forgetting you came easy,

Wishing just a goodbye would have done it all,

Wishing it was enough to erase all those memories,

Wishing just closing my eyes would end it all,

Wishing turning away would set me free,

From all those memories which look so distant

Now that you're not here anymore.

Lovers' Cove Challenge #3

Hellow friends,

This is my entry for the third challenge at Lovers' Cove. Am probably the last one, submitting the entry at the very eleventh hour. This time the challenge is a poem and each participant gets to add one line of 15 words or less. For more details and to participate please head over to Andy's blog.

The prompt-

Andy David -
If I were an artist, I would create the most beautiful flower in your image.

The following entries-

Elen Lackner -
And I would draw your lips like two petals of rose waiting for the dew.


Crystal -
Brilliant strokes of pale September falling down softly upon your skin exposing the beauty within.


Radwa Pony -
The beauty within your soul that kidnapped me to an endless dream of your own.


Balqis -
In each stroke of the brush flows a great affection devoted to you, my love.


Suzy -
Each colour relfecting the many seasons of your life and conveying all your intimate emotions.

Janu-

The sweet whispers of our souls reflecting in the faces radiant with love.

Kriti-

I drink your hues, merge into me, be born with me in a new color.

Leah-

Together we will explore love’s milky galaxies and claim the blushing moon as our own.

My Line-

I pour its rouge glory to your dewy lips and color you to angelic perfection.

P.S. - I have been absent from the blog world for quite sometime now, been really busy with Masters admission procedures. Will get back to reading all your amazing posts asap.

Till next

Love
Swarnali

The Dagger

Off late, I have been having this very disturbing and haunting nightmare that am stuck in a desert alone, trying to hold on to the earth and I just can't get anything when I try to grab it. The sand grains just slip out of my grip and I am left with nothing. I wake up crying in the middle of the nights with a fear of losing somebody I hold very dear, I don't know who. And the most difficult part is this fear isn't going away however hard I try. There is this unbearable pain somewhere, a very deep sense of loss that I have never felt before, that I can't explain or get rid of. Can any of you explain the logic behind this?

Anyhow I scribbled these lines in a state of semi-drowsiness at 3am yesterday, unable to sleep or remain awake. Please excuse the missing punctuation marks, I didn't feel like adding them when I saw these lines scribbled in my notebook when I woke up this morning.

The Dagger


I carry a dagger
Thrust in my chest
Unable to decide if
I should let it remain
And rip my interiors
Into irreparable tatters
With every movement I make
Or just take it off
And let myself bleed
To sweet death.


P.S.- Please forgive my excessive subjectivity in the post. Will be back with more objective posts soon. Please let me know your opinions if you think you know the answer to my fear.

Love
Swarnali

Forbidden

Hello Bloggy dosts,

I know I said this is guest bloggers month and only guests would do all the posts this month but I happened to scribble these lines last night and I couldn't help but put it here. (I hope you understand the feeling).

FORBIDDEN

How could it be wrong

When it felt so right?

The love we felt,

The bliss and glory of it,

The warmth that engulfed us,

The joy we knew,

When our forms coalesced into one

During that moment

Which felt more than eternity.

Dear Brother,

Tell me

Was I wrong

In loving you

Different from how they said I should?

Was it wrong

Just because you share a quarter of my genes?

Dear Brother,

Tell me

Isn't love one's own?

And its definition unique for each?

Then why are we afraid?

Then why is our love wrong

And their's right?

Tell me who decides

What's wrong and what's right?

Am sorry I can't write rhyming poems (I envy those who can do that). My lines are not structured as my life isn't structured either. No rhyme, no pattern it is. 

Well, coming to the subject of the poem, its on sibling incest. Yes, it is a tabooed subject for almost all countries in the world. I don't mean to encourage or damn it, the poem is an after thought after reading Tabitha Suzuma's book Forbidden. Its the tale of Maya and Lochan, brother and sister by birth but partners by fate. The subject was so beautifully and sensitively handled that I cried hours after reading it. The poem is about a hypothetical situation where fate has entangled two individuals who fall in love and blood ties do not make a difference. The fear, the insecurity they face is something I tried to portray. Let me know your responses.

Love 

Swarnali

That Feeling

If you are yet not tired of  reading my scribblings (that I happily call poems :P), here is yet another. This came out pretty weird actually,so I would love if you could tell me how I could improve on this one :)
This is the edited version of the poem. The last 2 lines in the second stanza were added by Andy . The lines I had written previously are kept in parenthesis. Thank you so much Andy!! :D


That Feeling


Will you believe me
If I said I knew
How it feels to be an
Insignificant and un-special
Nobody to somebody?


Will you believe me
If I said I knew
How it felt to be
The only invisible one
In a world made just for two?
(Invisible to that one
Everybody of your world?)


Will you believe me
If I said I have felt
Hurt and pain
In places I never knew
Existed in me?




P.S.- This is what happens to me when I watch too many romances. I cry for hours and then I start scribbling this. So please do not take this to be autobiographical. I just love getting into the shoes of characters and then sort of imagine what they must have felt. This time the character was Iris Simpkins (Kate Winslet) from The Holiday. :)


Will be back to my totally un-poetic posts soon :D
Till then
Love
Swarnali

Inscrutable

This is my first attempt at a love poem (?),so please bear with it. And do tell me if you think I could make it better in any way - anything I should have added or deleted.

Inscrutable

I love you

Because I can love no other

I hate you

Yes I do, very much

My heart torn,

Between loving you

And not loving you

I laugh a laugh of pure ecstasy

And then all of a sudden

Cry out in despair

Knowing you'll never be mine

My only wish now

Is to be consumed

By either, or both-

The fire and ice that swell inside me.

On a random and totally unrelated note the "Yes I do" in the 4th line reminds me of Nicki Minaj's "Superbass" (my sis read the name of the song as "Superb-Ass" the first time she saw it :D).

P.S. - Thank You Arpita for the inputs. Love ya <3

Lovers' Cove Challenge

I get to Priyanka's blog and come to know of this challenge which is going on at Andy's Blog.
Here are the rules-
A poem will be constructed by different bloggers. The prompt line will be given by Andy. All you have to do is add your line to the poem,based on the line above yours i.e. what the previous blogger has said. The line should be of 15 words or less. Check out the link to know more about the challenge.

So here it goes -

Title : (Yet to be determined)

Andy's Line(11 words) : A sleeping flower is more beautiful than a heart without love
Kriti's Line (14 words) : But I bleed enjoying your thorns of love, rest awhile so I may breathe
Punam's line (14 words) : The loss of your love O Heart! Put me to an eternal sleep
Rosette Princess' line (14 words) : And bury me somewhere , where my lover won't even find my grave to weep
Priyanka's Line (15 words) : And let me dream of a distant peace , that keeps swaying from me to him

My line (13 words) : Let this pain unbearable that dwells my heart vanish ; if only for sometime


Join the challenge and add your line !!!

It was not I

It was not I

I was nine
When you deflowered me.
You touched me
Against my wishes.

I screamed aloud,
But the words
Chocked in my throat
And no voice came out.

I cried silent tears,
In the silence of the night;
Unable to tell anyone
Of what I went through.

I felt violated,
Ashamed of my body,
Unable to look at myself
In the mirror.

But today,years later,
I refuse to let you
Crush my soul
And dampen my spirit.

It is I who decides
Not to tell the world
What you did to me
Behind those walls.

I refuse to let you
Make me guilty
For that I haven't done
What never was my fault.

For I refuse to be
Called a victim and
You as my abuser.
I shall rise and not 
Let you win over me.


 This post was inspired by -
1) Kamala Das' poem An Introduction
2) The second episode of  Satyamev Jayate and 
3) Pinki Virani's award winning book, Bitter chocolate-Child Sexual Abuse in India.

Life as it is

Hurray  exam over...yay!! Well I shouldn't be this exited as exam-saurus will be returning after two months ... :(
Never mind, am somebody who is a strict follower of the carpe-diem  theory (It means "seize the day" in case you didn't know). So enjoy as long as its not exam time again :P


This time we had to do creative writing in our paper VII. Had to do either of these-A poem on life,a short story about the little joys in life,a dialogue between two old people about their likes and dislikes in the modern world or a travelogue about a place of scenic beauty. I had planned to do this question in the end. But as luck would have it I was left with only the last 5 minutes to finish this one!! After a quick debate in my head,I decided to do the quickest i.e. the poem!! That was the only one which could be completed in a page,others would take a minimum of 5-6 pages. 
This was the first time I attempted a poem (for that matter I never tried to compose anything before,not of the creative type,see??). Just thought of sharing the poem that I wrote in less than 5 minutes-


LIFE AS IT IS

Life is a queer little thing; Comes around everyday Dressed in a new garb Shocking sometimes, Sometimes surprising. People come and people go. Some usher joy, Some bring sorrow; Some come with sunshine and Some tread paths like shadows. Love and hatred move In an endless coil; These sudden twists and turns Are what makes it life And living it better than death. I found this one a bit too simple for an exam but I couldn't do anything better within that time limit. Some friends who read it found it to be good enough. Aishwarya of Sweet Hug said she liked it...thank you so much girl!! Would love to know your honest comments on this. Feel free to tell me even if you didn't like it and also what changes I could do to make it better. On a different note,this year begun the most wonderful way it could. I won the new year's giveaway hosted at A Lot of Pages. I received the book yesterday from  Flipkart.com wrapped beautifully in a pretty shiny paper and a cute congratulations card :D. Thank you so so much A Lot of Pages for hosting the giveaway and Flipkart.com for sponsoring the award. I got,Shock Point by April Henry,a teen fiction I suppose (not a big fan of this genre but I didn't know it before choosing the book,the book might surprise me though!!) Its an imported edition,so took ten days to reach me after I had ordered. Can't wait to read it!! Take a look at the book. - Bubbye till next. Love Swarnali